? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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