Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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