Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
