I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
