farters have to be the big spoon...
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
