dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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