on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
