How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
