I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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