Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Randomize