i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
