Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
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