I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
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