Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
