No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
