i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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