We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
