I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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