You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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