i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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