no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
