mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
