just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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