Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
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