I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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