White coat. Heels.
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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