I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
