I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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