You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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