OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
