He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
