Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
