FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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