So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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