i permit you to call me
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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