talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
