I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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