At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
honey bunches of taint.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize