If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
