can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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