I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
