North Korea, Best Korea!
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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