they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
