I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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