And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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