we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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