i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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