Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
