Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
