weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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